139 Enaline’S Apology.
After attending the memorial service of the Guard, which was sacrificed in this battle at the Marquis Anderson’s house, I returned to the King’s Capital again.
“… Welcome back, Dear Merlis”
“Enaline”
My chest still hurts, to be honest, when I meet Enaline, who looks a lot like her I lost.
But… I’m not the only one who’s hard.
Instead, it would be harder for her to be with me from birth.
That is why I must not turn away.
From what I couldn’t protect.
From what I have to bear.
“… I don’t think it’s been a while since you’ve been at the Marquis Anderson’s.”
“That must be Master Merlis.”
“… that too, yeah”
When I returned to my room, Enaline followed me.
“… Dear Merlis. How about a new side?”
When I got to my seat, an unexpected question was asked by Enaline.
“… could that have been your job now?
“No…. but I’m sure… because Anna cared”
“… sorry”
There is a heavy silence between us.
“I’m not going to hire a new sidekick.”
“… then…”
“What I do around me is basically what I can do myself. You just need to hold someone’s hand for a night club or something…. Anna is the only side-service I’ve hired in my own volition”
For a moment, Enaline warped her face.
That look that seems painful…… spicy but endures not to drown in those emotions.
I was more likely to be flushed by the bitterness as I watched.
“… Dear Merlis”
“What?”
“… I will not tolerate. That you were so strong that you couldn’t protect her.”
… but decided not to turn away.
So I stare straight at her.
Her words are a natural curse… to be taken directly from the front.
“… why aren’t you angry?
She burst into tears at the edge of her eyes and asked so.
I don’t know what that question means and I just stare at her.
“That kid… Anna, she hoped. Chasing your back. To fight with you. Naturally, you were prepared to risk your own life…. so even though my words are nothing more than demeaning that child as a warrior…”
To Enaline’s words, I remember a journey I miss.
That was when Enaline and Anna just became my sidekicks.
After that battle of bandits… they were mourning their weakness.
And then the martial arts training was impatient.
That’s why…… I know exactly what Enaline is saying.
To have a sword is to be prepared for death.
Take someone’s life, and see that your own life is taken… not lightly.
Even though I was overly worried about her to say so… for her, it would have felt like she was being scorned for that readiness.
“Sure, yeah. I couldn’t protect her… that’s an insult to her. Because she stood there as a soldier. I couldn’t have taken someone I had to protect to that place.”
I thought it was me… I really knew.
But still.
“But… that’s all that meant about that kid, right? So you don’t have to forgive me. About me not the one who couldn’t protect that kid, but the one who took that kid out on the battlefield with a roll…. and keep an eye out. Can I remain the person she needs to protect?”
Tears were overflowing like a weir cut from both eyes of Enarine.
Have you been patient?
I’m sure you do.
“… I don’t care anymore…”
She kept apologizing as she cried down.
I reach out and hug her softly like that.
And I was also… overflowing with tears, mourning and soothing for her warmth.
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